Muffin Tops Belong Solely in a Bakery

The infomercial actress appeared on the tiny screen attached to the treadmill as I labored through a 40-minute jog. Wearing that annoying “you must purchase this product now because, you know, operators ARE standing by” grin, the woman gleefully hawked a line of T-shirts she claimed hid her “muffin top.” My sweaty forefinger hit the…