President Obama’s 2017 To-Do List

The big White House grandfather clock, or the iPhone depending on how President Obama keeps track of time, is ticking down on the commander-in-chief’s final year in office. And speculation abounds over the items on his to-do list. Close Guantanamo, change federal sentencing mandates, end the civil war in Syria, appoint a new Supreme Court…

My Dog Fetches…To a Fault

Lately my dog has been spending a lot of time watching CNN. This is not by choice; she is not an avid cable television news viewer, although she has been known to snarl any time Don Lemon appears onscreen. Her viewing habits consist of incessant barking whenever a commercial airs featuring a dog of any…

I Need the Springsteen Workout

Greg Schwem is a corporate comedian and syndicated humor columnist whose work appears weekly  in the Chicago Tribune and the Huffington Post The personal trainer looked me up and down, mentally taking notes before deciding what my body could handle over a one-hour session, the first of three. “Not only will we be exercising but we’ll…

Penthouse Forum Freshman, Who Are You?

Confusion briefly reigned in the publishing world last week when reports surfaced that Penthouse magazine, a purveyor of sex and nudity for more than 50 years, would cease its print edition. Or would it? Penthouse officials quickly backtracked, saying accounts of its print demise had been exaggerated due to a poorly worded press release touting…